7:59 p.m. - 2009-06-12
that penetrating sad. that unforgivable sad. the sad you never want to write about
it's the rain. the giant oak tree that died by the wind today and landed right by my apartment. it's the power that won't be restored for two days. the feeling of abandonment, isolation, relief of having somewhere to go, but it not being where you WANT to be. selfish. a selfish sadness.
it's the effort you make
games with God. games with men. games with myself.
the tickle in my throat is telling me
it feels sad to not forgive. to have patience and dreams that only lead up to this day, a day like this.
and every day has something hidden, to make you smile. but they were all found early, all at once.
and now i am sad. the kind that i can't describe except to say
i'm tired. please leave me alone.